Friday, August 19, 2011

Changes, changes, changes

For the first time in five years, I will be living in the same place for more than one year (The roommates are changing so it is not 100% the same situation). And I bought a couch and table and chairs (both used and from my former roommate). That is enough to make me have a minor panic attack. I guess, there is something nice about laying down 'roots', not moving, and 'knowing' an area. It is terrifying to me. 'I am too young to settle' rushes through my mind sometimes daily. And I don't like having this much stuff that I have to worry about (no comments from my mother who has to put up with my personal shrine of junk in my room at home). Don't worry though, the people I am renting from are moving back into their house in one year, so I am not too settled - or even if I am, I will be kicked out of the nest again soon enough. And both my roommates and my job have changed, so this change addict is still getting her fix :). I am still unsure why the thought of being committed to anything is so terrifying for me. I guess, I just feel like there is so much of the world to see. Everyone says, appreciate your age right now because you can go and do anything you want. Once you get married, have kids, have a mortgage, are climbing the ladder at work, etc. you can't adventure anymore. So, I am trying to accept the not moving as a nice stable place from which to jump off - easier to jump from a rock than quick sand.

To update you all on the job, as I know many of you have been wondering, I am going to be working part-time at the program that brought me to Washington, DC three and a half years ago. I will be assisting one of my former-professors and doing a plethora of random things. It will give me exposure to the inner-workings of University programs to some extent, who knows at times I have thought I might enjoy working at a university. Best, though, is that I will have time to better discern what my life's next steps are/try some things. Thanks to many teachers on a life of simplicity, I can fairly easily make ends meet on a part-time job and can recommit to the other tenants I learned last year of community, social justice, and spirituality. My life had become badly unbalanced over this past year, and I now am blessed with the opportunity to bring back that balance and stop and listen. I have time to really answer questions like, "When have you felt most energized?" "What topics most upset you?" and "What would you like to see change in the world?" All great questions from a 'discerning life's call' survey I recently used as a reflecting tool. So, in addition to again doing laundry regularly, cleaning up my yard, and running more, I hope to use this time to volunteer, network, do informational interviews, and catch up on the academic side of my interests.

As always, thanks for your prayers, thoughts, comments, critiques, and words of wisdom!