Hi Friends!
I hope you had a great and peaceful week! For those who have been following my blogging, you will know I gave up most food (only eating beans, rice, squash, corn, apples, and milk) for the past week. Even as I write that, it seems like I was still eating a lot of stuff. And again, I learn more and more about 'addiction' I feel each week of 'fasting'. This was a hard week though.
One of the first things I realized was that I have an overwhelming access to food. It may be with the holiday season, I think it is just the generosity of those with which I work, but there were at least three different 'free foods' sitting on our kitchen counter each day. Everything from mixed nuts, chips, and fruit to muffins, cinnamon rolls, and bagels. Needless to say, there was endless temptation :). I can proudly say I have enough Catholic Guilty that I did not cheat once on my fasting :). In this though, I did realize that if for some reason I had just not had the money to buy food this week, the reality I live in would never have allowed me to be hungry. One day I even heard one co-worker saying, "I haven't gone to the store because it is so cold outside so I literally have no food in my house." Another co-worker then offered, "Do you want half of my lunch?" Food access is definitely not something I lack...
Another realization that I came to is that food for me is more than just a way to nourish my body. When I am stressed or emotional in a negative or positive way, I cook/bake/eat. I still cooked and baked this week, I just fed it to other people excluding my rice and beans :)
I also don't think I have ever really understood the word craving before... All I wanted all week were things from the bottom of the food pyramid, excluding rice. Bread. Pasta. Cereal. My stomach some mornings would literally wake me up growling, because one can only eat so many bowls of squash, beans, rice, and corn. Yet, when I would get to the kitchen to heat up my rice and milk breakfast, my stomach would have changed its mind, if that was the option, and I would literally have to choke down the bowl trying to tell my body it would need the nourishment for the bike ride to work...
So the next time I contribute to a non-perishable food drive, I don't care if beans and rice give me the most bang for the buck, I will be buying some kind of healthy canned soup or fruit or something with some excitement. I will be passing on something that someone will enjoy eating. Something that I would enjoy eating. Perhaps some pasta to go with that soup...
The next week of advent is the week of joy, yahoo pink candle. This is a side note and a bit of a tangent, as a child I always use to think or would pretend (because I was never that naive a child :-P ) that the pink candle was because of me as it almost always falls right near my birthday :) So be joyful! I have really tried to do that constantly at work, because everyone is stressed this season both those who call to donate furniture, co-workers, and those who are sleeping on the floor. It is amazing to see how it rubs off. So rub off some joy this week and I will send you my reflections on sleeping on the floor next weekend from OREGON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Until then,
~ Karen
The Carb-a-holic
P.S. Saturday is my Break-fast day, and I literally had to stop writing mid-way through this to truly appreciate and devour a succulent bagel. :)
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