Comfort Zone

 

My friend Vandy and I traded shoes

This whole adjusting to a new culture involves a fair amount of trying to walk in another human's shoes.  Perhaps, this means walking paths outside my normal comfort zone, but for me, it is amazing how quickly one can adapt.  I recently have been contemplating a lot about how we all often say in our daily life, "Oh, I don't know how to do that."  Or "I can't do that."  What would happen if we instead said, "I can learn to do that."  or "I will figure out how to make that work"  It would be amazing what we can learn and accomplish.  For those who know me well, you will know I am a VERY fearful person.  I like back-up plans and escape routes and do not like being out of control of "the plan."  I always tell friends, I can plan to have no plan and then it is ok :)  But, I also strongly believe in expanding my comfort zone and am addicted to transition, so enjoy pushing those boundaries.

One example of boundary pushing, that recently happened relates to language.  I can remember just six short months ago, being completely lost language wise.  At times it has been frustrating.  I remember thinking, I will never get these sounds, I will never remember all these letters, I can't write except in phonetics, writing two sentences takes me 30 minutes or more because I have to look up every word BUT, amazingly, I have reached all of these milestones.  I insisted on learning the letters, and started teaching myself until my teachers decided it was ok to teach them to me, trying always to push myself even if there was an easier way, or my teachers didn't require me to push myself, or at times said, "that is too hard for you right now."  Funny, now, though I am nowhere near fluent and will have to continue to push myself, things that even a month ago I wouldn't have thought I could remember, I now have down.

Another comfort zone push for me has been buying fruit/veggies daily.   There is a market within spitting distance of my house.  If I want to eat a kilo of mangosteen, not that I do that every day or anything, all I have to do it walk 60 seconds and I can get my Kilo of Mangosteen.  I always said I wanted to be a regular somewhere, Cheers-style.  Well, I can't say they know my name but they see me coming and start selecting the best Mangosteens from the pile and put them in a bag - and they are always glad I came.  If another customer happens to be there, my saleslady and her son, explain that I buy them every day (as the other customers can't understand why we don't even have to speak).  This process though, of going to the market, was initially overwhelming.  I would be afraid I couldn't communicate, what if I couldn't make a decision, what if I made a fool of myself, what if????  Go figure, all those "what ifs" were for not.  I always end up with the food I want and have yet to do something completely foolish (I always check to make sure I am wearing pants before leaving the house!)  Again, expanding my normal (not the checking for pants, the going to market... maybe I should quit while I am ahead).

I guess, all this is to say, any of us can do this in our daily life.  I don't think one needs to move half-way around the world.  It is just a matter of picking one thing and saying I want this to be a part of who I am and doing it.  Could be going to bed earlier, could be talking to people on the bus (don't try that one in DC ;)), could be biking to the grocery store, could be reading the newspaper.  With all the time we spend making excuses as to why it can't be done, we could be half way to mastery and a much larger comfort zone.  Then, when that becomes our normal, pick another and slowly, we all grow as human beings.  That must be good for all of us, right?

**** If though, you think visiting half-way around the world is a good way to expand your comfort zone, I have an opportunity for you!  I have mentioned before MKLM leads Friends Across Borders trips to the various regions where MKLM works and there is one coming to 'Bodia in February of next year!  If anyone is interested, you can find more information here (or just ask).

Number one selling point for coming on this trip...

... You get to spend Valentine's Day 2015 with the lovely lady on the left.  Frosting not included.